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Confidence. This powerful word can have so many meanings. It could be the one thing that sets you free, or the one thing that is holding you back from what you have always wanted to do or be. For some, it could mean wearing that sexy little 2 piece swimsuit and not being afraid; or it could go as deep as stepping into a relationship/career/sport you have always dreamed of. Have you ever wondered the price you have paid from lack of confidence? It ultimately affects every area of your life, yet we tend to put it to the side and not face the root cause of it all. If you are ready to face the truth and make a change, keep reading; you might just learn a little something about yourself!
Now that you have those juices flowing in your mind, I’m sure it has sparked some curiosity. How do I get my confidence back? The reason I say "getting it back" is because you have always had it. You were born with it. It is the essence of your true self before all the challenges, and before society molded you to think otherwise. Yes, deep inside, it has been thrown into the corner of a dark closet. Not anymore — you will soon have keys to open that closet door again and shine some light on what once was.
This step is probably one of the most important because you have to be completely ready to be honest, vulnerable, and open with yourself. Give yourself 1 minute to write down all the adjectives that describe you. Start with the words, “I am.” Here is the key in this step: truly feel if the words resonate with you. If you don’t feel them, don’t write them down. This will give you an idea of where you stand. You may have 5 listed, or you may have 15. How comfortable were you while doing this? On a scale from 1-10, where would you say your confidence is? Remember to be honest with yourself.
[Related: Building Your Self-Esteem and Thriving Naturally]
It could be physical, career, relationships, family, self-love, etc. Now, choose the one that is the priority in your life at this moment. Think of any and all of the negative memories you recall with this category. The deeper you go, the better. Try recalling things from your childhood. I suggest writing them down in a journal so you can create the flow. This process is for awareness of where the root cause of that particular issue resides. Give yourself ample time for this as it may bring up things that you had locked away.
After you are done writing, go back through each situation and turn it into a positive. Make the choice to see the situation from a different perspective. Choose to change that thought and re-create the situation with a new set of eyes. Maybe something said wasn’t meant to be hurtful. Write down the new version of the negative memories and make them a positive one. This will allow your mind to unchain that link and free your mind.
